Judith Regan: Fired and still not Jewish

Last month I was forced to dissect Judith Regan's thoroughly un-Jewish background to defend my people against the constant barrage of false accusations that the controversial and sometimes loathsome publisher is a member of the tribe.

Well, Regan's back in the news again. This time getting herself fired by Rupert Murdoch* for promoting OJ Simpson, conspiring to debase the legacy of Mickey Mantle, being generally out-of-control and making "comments that were deemed to be anti-Semitic."

Despite this, message board commentators -- who sort of just won Time's Man of the Year -- were back to attributing Regan's evil nature to her falsely perceived Jewishness.

Of course Jews can and do make what would be deemed anti-Semitic statements. In fact, being a clever and achievement-oriented people the Jews make some of the best anti-Semitic comments you'll ever hear. But Regan isn't Jewish. For further proof, here is what a tipster told Gawker of Regan's anti-Semitic behavior:

She was constantly muttering about 'Jew agents' in the office and once claimed to staffers that, as a joke, she went through her old apartment building on the Upper West Side, took all the torah scrolls out of the mezzuzahs at the doors and replaced them with torn-up dollar bills."

Muttering about Jew agents is one thing. I'm sure if I was ever fortunate enough to be involved in a big-money deal with lots of Jewish players, I'd do the same. But you know you are a hopeless anti-Semite when you have become so blinded by your delusions about a Jewish-controlled media that you are able to convince yourself a Jewish person would tear up money.

* Unlike Regan, Murdoch's Jewish background is debatable.

Michael Richards and Judith Regan: Not Jews

Michael Richards has been a popular topic of conversation over in message board world. A good chunk of the discussion has been focused on Richard's Jewish background. Unfortunately for any semblance of cyber-accuracy, Michael Richards is not Jewish. Not even a little bit. (Neither was Cosmo Kramer.)

This probably explains why Richards didn't "learn" anything from the Mel Gibson incident. It also absolves the Jewish people of having a devilish double-standard on the important issue of offensive celebrity language. For now at least. Of course there are many Jewish celebrities, and one could go on a racist rant at any moment and send all the Jews back to the hypocrisy doghouse.

Although controversial book publisher Judith Regan wouldn't be the one. Not because she doesn't have an offensive tirade in her, but because, like Richards, she is not Jewish. This would come as surprise to anyone who has been reading posts about Regan and her involvement in the OJ Simpson book controversy on the message boards.

While I understand why Richards is assumed to be Jewish -- every other major figure involved with Seinfeld is -- Regan is a common Irish-American last name. I guess it's possible to be both Irish and Jewish. That mix would describe Leopold Bloom, although he is a fictional character.

Is Regan maternally Jewish? Nope. A quick Wikipedia check reveals Regan gets her slightly Mediterranean looks from a Sicilian mom. Where she gets her scruple-less love of money remains an open question.

It blows me away that so many different commentators would make such strong anti-Semitic comments without even bothering to confirm their target is really Jewish. Wikepedia is set up for easy religious and ethnic ID. When one is already on the Internet, how hard can checking this valuable resource tool be?

There is all sorts of fascinating stuff on Wikipedia. I just learned Judith Regan has been described as the world's highest functioning deranged person.

That's an impressive accomplishment. And, despite what you may hear, one the Jews can not claim.