It's talk show 2.0!

Carson Daly was once a big wheel over at the MTV. As the host of Total Request Live his passive-aggressive modesty and back-of-the-bus snark impressed the kids -- especially the lady kids -- so much that he was able to date Tara Reid, Christina Aguilera and Jennifer Love Hewitt. A trio that sounded a whole lot better back in 2000 than it does now.

The networks were not impervious to Daly's smarm, and about five years ago he was given his own late-night talk show on NBC. Oddly, Daly's move from cable to broadcast didn't raise his profile. In fact, save the occasional update on his burgeoning manorexia, Daly darn near fell from the face of the earth.

Daly was back in the news yesterday, as a result of many prominently placed reports that his will be the first late night talk show to defy the writer's strike.

To make up for the missing writers, Daly, who is not a Writer's Guild of America member, sent out an email to friends suggesting they call in jokes to a"joke hotline." Daly will then play the recorded jokes on the air as part of a larger gag about the hilarity of non-professionals suggesting jokes to him.

This is not unlike what Johnny Carson allegedly did when he resumed production during the 22-week writers strike of 1988. Only that was before email and all this sausage-making meta, so the talk show legend's appeal to friends never made it to the Smokinggun.com, and when Carson did receive jokes he read them, himself, in a professional manner.

But this is 2007, and if Wikipedia can be a primary source for authoritative information, and Ron Paul can have his Presidential campaign run by his supporters, maybe America is ready for our first open source opening monologue.

And if the masses end up getting their own late night time slot, who better to be replaced than Carson Daly?

Tara Reid is not mathematically inclined

It's one of life's cruel ironies: Those who become celebrities for no reason -- and are able to sustain this baseless fame for a certain period time -- eventually start receiving financial compensation just for being famous. For example, Paris Hilton is currently getting half a million dollars to tour around Australia, strike bored poses and stiff local establishments on ten dollar lunch bills.

Tara Reid, presumably, comes for a lot cheaper than that. So some Chicago party promoters paid her to appear at their gala New Year's party, figuring the strong correlation between Tara Reid appearing at a party and Tara Reid falling off a table and out of her dress at a party would sell more 200 dollar tickets.

A solid enough strategy. Unfortunately, they went a step further and allowed Tara to do the countdown. Confusion ensued. Mayhem was barely avoided.

I don't know if we can just blame Tara, or if an unseen teleprompter contributed, but what follows does not display the linear quality we have come to expect and demand from a New Year's Eve countdown:


If you watched that, it's like you spent New Year's Eve with Tara Reid -- but for free!

Schadenfreude Thursday

I'm not usually about things like this, but it happens to be I do have something against Tara Reid.

You see about five years back, whenever I found myself in a discussion about which actresses were "hot," I would offer up Tara Reid pretty quickly.

This would surprise people. Not that they thought Tara was unattractive, but because I am known to be unusually judicious with the word "hot" and Reid apparently didn't seem like the type that would impress someone with such a reputation.

I was adamant about it though, and would argue the point with vigor when challenged. In the early millennium I was responsible for scores of people taking another look at the blonde actress.

Tara has rewarded my seal of approval by making herself into a rapidly aging punch line for the destructive nature of overindulgence. With every photo of her latest mangled plastic surgery or sloppy bar dancing mishap my face reddens with embarrassment as I think about the way I once enthusiastically endorsed her. When people are laughing at Tara I can't help but thinking some of these people are also laughing at me.

Well it looks like hard-living and karma have caught up with the New Jersey native. Watch Tara (looking pretty OK, actually) get denied at some trendy Hollywood club, while her former best friend Paris Hilton skates right in.



The best part of the video is the soundtrack. Never have I been so jealous of the rich and famous as when I discovered they get to listen to Kenny Loggins at the club. Man, I wish I was a celebrity.

And so does Tara Reid.