Showing posts with label Katie Holmes. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Katie Holmes. Show all posts

Monday, December 17, 2007

Idle threat of the week

Many suspect Tom Cruise of harboring a secret. Perhaps this is because the Top Gun actor once studied to be a priest. Or perhaps it is because his sex scenes with then-wife Nicole Kidman in Eye Wide Shut were so improbable and awkward audience members were forced to conclude the Hollywood couple with two adopted children had yet to consummate their relationship off screen.

Becoming a Scientologists only added to the talk Cruise has something to hide, as other famous male actors who elicit similar whispers have also hitched their wagon to the nouveau-religion.

Cruise divorced Kidman in 2001, and, amid snickers about elaborate contracts and ten million dollar payouts, married Katie Holmes in 2006.

Miffed that last time he wed a desirable actress his relationship with her only made him appear gayer, Cruise seems to have instructed Holmes to play up the physical aspect of their marriage during interviews. Like when she spoke to US Magazine last week and revealed her husband's biggest turn on:

Tom likes me in a suit and a mini every now and then. I like it when he likes it. It makes me blush. He'll say, 'You look good. I hope security's going with you.' Now that gives me attitude.

Well that's a weird way to put it. Especially for someone who was born in America with English as her first language. I suspect, in conversations with Cruise (and Cruise's auditor) before the interview, Holmes had been prepped that research shows many heterosexual men are turned on by a woman in uniform. But Holmes, obviously not much for improv, got confused and wasn't sure if she was supposed to be wearing the uniform, or if she was supposed to be surrounded by a group of strapping men wearing uniforms.

And Tom Cruises' attempt to use Katie Holmes to prove he is all the action hero he can be is the Idle Threat of the Week for December 10-16. The role of Tom Cruise's wife is a challenging one and they should have hired a better actress.

Monday, November 05, 2007

Idle threat of the week

Yesterday morning found Katie Holmes slinking around under the guise of an alias and running as hard as she can for many hours. Although I'm sure any attentive member of the ever growing Free Katie movement already knows their girl was just participating in the New York City Marathon, and not only was watchful hubby Tom Cruise tracking her every movement, but he made sure to mark his territory be planting a kiss on the actress as she entered the home stretch.

But speculation is ripe that Holmes has finally owned up to her Stockholm (Scientology?) Syndrome and is now in training for an eventual escape from Cruise's contractual clutches. If so, how is Katie's plan progressing?

It's always impressive to finish a marathon, but Katie clocked in at 5 hours and 29 minutes. To put that in perspective, the oft-rotund Opera Winfrey once ran in 4 hours and 29 minutes, and former Presidential candidate Michael Dukakis -- whose eyebrows could function as parachutes -- still sliced through the air for a personal best of 3 hours and 29 minutes.

Keeping in mind Tom Cruise stays in shape by shooting running intensive films such as Mission Impossible and War of the Worlds, it's highly doubtfully that, with her posted time, Katie could outrun Tom. Let alone all of the other Scientologists -- some of whom may own speedy spacecrafts.

And Katie Holmes's attempt to escape back to the normalcy of being a Hollywood movie star is the Idle Threat of the Week for October 29th to November 4th.

Or, to cut to the chase, Katie won't be taking her top off again anytime soon.

Wednesday, September 06, 2006

They must have dyed her eyebrows to cover it up


Since he obviously adopted a Chinese baby, why did Tom make Katie go through that whole silent birth charade? Weird dude, that Maverick.