Week five picks

Tennessee at INDIANAPOLIS (-18) I was more impressed with Vince Young's passing than his running last week. And I wasn't impressed with his passing at all. He looked shockingly slow. I don't know if it was nerves, or maybe there was something wrong with my TV. But if he continues to move around like Vinny Testerverde, Tennessee has a problem.

Cleveland at CAROLINA (-8) Former Redskin quarterback Heath Shuler is running for congress in North Carolina and leads his republican incumbent opponent by ten. Shuler hasn't beat anyone since college, so a loss to the former third overall pick could devastate an already reeling GOP. Then a Shuler return to Washington could trigger post-traumatic episodes in 'skins fans.

Miami at NEW ENGLAND (-9.5) Last week New England taught me a valuable lesson in not betting against New England.

BUFFALO at Chicago (-10.5) I'd go as far as to say I think Buffalo is going to win.

Tampa Bay at NEW ORLEANS (-6.5) Reggie Bush's production has declined every week this season. He also looks small. Vince Young slow and Reggie Bush small -- welcome to the pros.

St. Louis at GREEN BAY (+3) Without Kornheiser to jinx him with fawning praise, a woozy Farve should play well at home against a bad defense.

Washington at GIANTS (-5) The NFC East JV game. It will be tied late and Eli will win it with some goofy no-look pass. All the previouis bad play when he was looking will be forgotten.

Detroit at MINNESOTA (-6.5) Roy Williams didn't say anything ridiculous this week. I'll reward him by mentioning he's averaging 96 yards a game this season.

Oakland at SAN FRANSISCO (-3.5) Oakland's only getting the standard 3.5 on the road? This almost seems like a trick. I almost took Oakland. Almost.

JETS at Jacksonville (-7) Jacksonville's vaunted D looked pretty bad last week. The Jets might suffer a post so-close-against-Indy let down, but I'm thinking Mangini has something good going in New York.

KANSAS CITY at Arizona (+3.5) How will Leinart effect the fantasy values of Boldin and Fitzgerald? That would be the only reason to care about this game.

Dallas at PHILADELPHIA (-2) Terrell Owens, who once played for Philadelphia, returns for the first time.

Pittsburgh at SAN DIEGO (-3) Schottenheimer is German for fourth quarter collapse.

BALTIMORE at Denver (-4) Since Denver isn't associated with a certain food, Kornheiser will focus on the altitude and how great John Elway used to be. Bonus points for Cal Ripken Jr. references.