NFL picks

BUFFALO (+6) at Miami JP Losman slyly continues to exist. Daunte Culpepper's inability to comprehend certain defensive schemes is now discussed openly. Take the Bills with the points.

Carolina at MINNESOTA (Even) Consensus is against a hamstrung Steve Smith playing. I always like a decent Viking team in the thunderdome.

Cleveland at CINCINNATI (-10.5) I've heard Browns' Quarterback Charlie Frye is only comfortable throwing to tight end Kellen Winslow Jr. A tragic turn for the flesh and bones professional football squad in Cleveland but quite spectacular for those, like myself, who own Winslow in the cyberworld.

Detroit at CHICAGO (-8.5) Lion receiver Roy Williams guarantees victory. Lion GM Matt Millen guarantees the Lions will finish 4-12 and then draft another first-round bust of receiver.

TAMPA BAY (+5.5) at Atlanta I think the Falcons will win, but these rivals rarely play games separated by more than a field goal. Also, this feels like a Tampa-really-isn't-that-bad and Atlanta-really-isn't-that-good game.

Oakland at BALTIMORE (-12.5) Lewis, Reed and Co. vs. Aaron Brooks? The horror ... the horror ...

Giants at PHILADELPHIA (-3) I can't be responsible for jinxing the Eagles. Maybe if these picks go horribly wrong I will go against them next week.

NEW ORLEANS (-2) at Green Bay A Packer victory is now defined as a week when Koren Robinson hasn't committed vehicular homicide.

Houston at INDIANAPOLIS (-13.5) When Houston's opening drive in their blow-out opening-game loss to the Eagles went for a touchdown, the announcers described it as "the best drive in Texan history." They weren't lying.

Arizona at SEATTLE (+7) Why is Deion Branch worth a first round draft pick? He has never had over 1000 yards or 5 TD's and the Patriot's system tends to make players look better than they really are. Nevertheless, the 'hawks offense rebounds in this one.

ST. LOUIS (-3) at San Francisco Frank Gore looks like he is this year's fantasy LaMont Jordan. But I'm also buying the post-Martz Rams-actually-have-a-defense-that-won't-melt-in-the-open-air hype.

Kansas City at DENVER (+11) Is it just me, or is Jake Plummer the perfect candidate to pull-off the NFL's first locker room spree killing?

New England at NJ JETS (+6) This is going to be the Patriots' year of winning ugly -- and not by more than six points on the road.

Tennessee at SAN DIEGO (+11.5) Tennessee ain't Oakland. Or are they?

Washington at DALLAS (-6) Losing team's aging quarterback will be ritually sacrificed after the game. While it would be interesting to see if T.O. is first in line to toss Bledsoe into the cauldron, I live in the DC area and would prefer if Brunell is boiled because I could listen and watch.

PITTSBURGH (-2.5) at Jacksonville Even if it's Charlie Batch again, I liked the way the Steelers won last week without playing their best football.

There will be accountability, come Tuesday.