Monday, October 09, 2006

Idle threat of the week

When a C list celebrity feuds with a third-tier city rest assured the panel of judges who decide Idle Threat of the Week take note.

That's exactly what happened in Western Pennsylvania a few days ago. It started when
Sienna Miller told Rolling Stone magazine that Pittsburgh, where she found herself stuck shooting a movie, wasn't a fun place to be. So much so that she had taken to calling the Steel City Shittsburgh because, you know, it isn't a very fun place to be.

The city of Pittsburgh responded by threatening to
boycott Sienna Miller's movies and writing all sorts of nasty things about the British citizen on various message boards.

It didn't surprise the panel that Miller, part of the snooty London glitterati, found Pittsburgh boring, or that Pittsburgh became somewhat cataclysmic in their outrage when they heard she did. What did surprise the panel was that Sienna Miller was shooting a movie.

Miller has garnered a certain amount of celebrity for being a model with a "boho chic" fashion sense and a willingness to be photographed in various states of undress. Most famously she was involved in a tabloid frenzy when it was discovered her fiancee, Jude Law, had cheated on her with their rather frumpy nanny.

While many of us had seen Miller referenced as an "actress" before, the general consensus among the panel was the press was just doing this to be nice. Like how you call that sort of retarded guy who stands outside the post office and cheerfully says hi to everyone "mayor."

In fact Miller is an actress with a few movies under her belt. Since no one on the panel had actually seen a Sienna Miller movie we were able to deduce no one in Pittsburgh had either. Making Pittsburgh's threat to boycott akin to declaring everyone in the city had decided to stop hitting themselves in the head with a pick ax.

So cheer up Pittsburghians, Roethlisburger and the Steelers may have lost their Super Bowl mojo, but your whole, entire city has won Idle Threat of the Week for October 2 -8.

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