Wednesday, May 23, 2007

Paris finds religions

Lately, it's been a tough go for the Christian Right. They lost founding father Jerry Falwell and their standing in the Republican party has become so diminished that they have been forced to consort with a bible-updating Mormon. Pundits have began speculating that the days of their political and social influence (which were greatly exaggerated to begin with) have come and gone.

But on Monday they got a brief reprieve from their demise: Paris Hilton was spotted accessorizing her blue dress with a gold hued Holy Bible. Could this high profile product placement be the start of something? Would Americans now flock to the True Word like tabloids to Paris's fleshy exploits, or the Japanese to Paris's signature brand of Hello Kitty dolls?

And does this now mean when celebrities sin and seek public absolution they shun worldly rehab and head straight for the unadulterated bosom of the original forgiver?

Sadly no, on both counts. For yesterday the fast-reading Hilton was already done with the Bible and had moved on to Buddha to help deal with her impending incarceration. Scientology and Kabbalah await.

As for the Christian Right . . . Mitt is a really cool name.

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