Help me drive the bums back onto the streets

I'm all for being a good tipper. It usually rewards someone who is working hard, it can sometimes lead to better service and it is a good way to score karmatic points -- if you believe in that kind of stuff.

But there is one job function I will never tip and I would like to encourage others to join me in this boycott.

The concept of a bathroom attendant was probably invented a long time ago at a tony hunting club somewhere. All the members got together to think of ways to prove how rich and decadent they were and decided employing a man who would be forced to listen to them poo would do the trick.

Since I'm one to believe that business is best handled with as little company as possible, I probably wouldn't have joined that club.

Lately, I've noticed more and more modern day bars and clubs have been throwing a bathroom attendant in the mix.

Some would claim having a bathroom attendant keeps the bathroom cleaner. The only problem with this logic is the types of establishments that use a bathroom attendant have traditionally figured out other ways to keep their bathrooms clean.

Maybe they think having a uniformed bathroom attendant "classes" the place up. But there's nothing classy about a bar full of people who have avoided washing their hands after using the restroom because they didn't want to pay someone for the privilege of having a paper towel handed to them.

The bathroom attendant does nothing you wouldn't instinctively do yourself. Yet he inexplicably requests compensation.

So he is a bum. But instead of panhandling on a street corner, this bum is given a bowtie and allowed to hang out in a bathroom. The whole thing is really, really gross.

If we stop giving them money they will go back to the streets where they belong.