Thursday, November 01, 2007

It's all Australia all day on the JSB

This morning I posted on Australian Prime Ministerial candidate Kevin Rudd, who was caught on film eating his own earwax. I want to make clear that I'm not trying to single out Australian politicians as earwax eaters. I'm sure there are many American politicians with a similar taste for ear cheese. It's just, due to Americans coming from Puritans and Australians coming from felons, we don't have in this country a prison yard sense of openness, and are more likely to do our unsavory feasting shamefully behind closed doors.

Likewise, you would be a fool to even suggest that American politicians don't enjoy taking photographs of their penises -- I'd be willing to bet there is at least one member of Congress doing so right now. But, as of yet, none of these portraits have ended up all over the Internet. A fate which has befallen Andrew Quah, a now-former Australian parliamentary candidate.

Quah, a music teacher when he's not running for office or taking pictures of his penis, represented Sydney for the Christian values Family First Party. Which is why it is no surprise the photos were first spotted on a gay website. (Considering how susceptible and sensitive religiously conservative groups are to accusations of hypocritical behavior, you would think they would stay away from running male music teachers in elections. Maybe that's just me. . .)

Quah doesn't deny that the pictures are of him, but maintains the penises in question are not his, and have been nefariously photoshopped in.

A last ditch attempt to salvage his relationship with the Family First party? Maybe. But more likely his dick denial is in response to his new nickname, which is, in a parody of a popular Aussie television show, "Australia's Smallest Loser."

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